Walter Miller Home Page

Mid-January 1997 Update

Fan mail Wrap-Up of The Prior Year

YES this is the fun part for me. All during 1996 lots of email was sent to "

Mostly good mail but a small bit criticol of my speling and exagorations. This is adresed in the Coming Clean section which you can get to from the prior page.

Alot of mail was reqeusts for my book. No kidding Im really writing one: the story of my pre-Trailer life, how i was a Internet industry bigshot at a yuong age, how I screwed up my life an why Im stuck here.

Yes if do want to get a copy, if you write me, I will write you back ONE simple email if and when the book comes out--who knows when thatll be as these things take time but Ill keep it on file. Also, your email adress will NEVER be given out! (Rest asured granfather wont find it eithor--itll be on a disk HID UNDER THE SOAP).

Speakin of unsolicted Comercial Email: Granfather is PISSED AS HELL at C|Net. A few months ago he signed up ONLY for there weekly Thursday email dispaches, and dont you know, he gets a SPAM from them on a MONDAY about some danm game there selling.

This is the reason granfater has a unlisted email adress. But people find it anyway.

The only thing that gets him more mad than spam is that anoying chain lettor email FRIGIN GOOD LUCK TOTEM. Surely youv also gotten this ASCII monstrosity. When Granps gets one he edits the totem to obscenly resemble SOMTHIN ELSE (try to geuss) then sends it back tothe sender.

Many people wrote to thank me for havin a 100% GRAHPIC FREE website. No, im not aganst graphics. Its just i like a fast loading site--youl also notice all my pages are about 5000 bytes THATS IT.

Too bad i DONT use graphics or else I coud say cool things like: 'Why is this page brown?' as a form of protest aganst exesive repulsivness of my mutant granfather or perhaps run a 'brown ribbon campiagn' to free me of my curent abusive sitation. Oh well.

I also got lots good coments on the Cristmos Sing Along page. OK I ADMIT only 1 song was was realy writen by granfather and only one by me. The rest were by my 2 best freinds Stu and John who made most ofthe words rhyme cause Im not good at it BUT MOST OF THE SONGS WERE MY IDEA AND I DID ALL THE HTML CODING.

In case your curoius to the most populor Walter Miller Homepage items for 1996, based on mail they are in order:

Close behind are 'Intervention' and The Wedgie Page--which I admit is gettin crusty and stale lately and needs an update. If YOU got a favorite update or featore let me know.

MANY PERSONAL THANKS people thruout the year whov become freinds: Shanney, John, Alicia, Rhonda, Aubrey, Levi, Kevin, Eric, Rock 103 in Memphis, Joey, Carl, Wendy, Cheri, Chris the Wedgie Man, Terry, Mirsky, Stu and many more. If i forgot you IM SORRY.


the lady in Canada who keeps sendin nakad pitcures of herself: The files are TOO BIG I CANT downlaod them but granfather thanks you anyway for the effort. (Besides, your text descriptons of what your DOIN in the pictures seem to do the job alone).

Geez you Canadeins must all be freezin your asses off this time of year. Hopefuly this year Summer will fall on a weekend. But you know i love my Canadian fans an they love me.


I canot for the life of me figore out why im so danm popular in English speaking non-U.S. places like Austrlaia, New Zealond, Ireland, the U.K. and Suoth Africa--but especialy and overwelmingly CANADA. I guess me & Grampy reinforce to them the stupidoty of rural Americans and their own true intelectual and cultoral superority over us. I even get mail from places where no one lives like Yuokon, NWT and Prince Albert Island.

I like Canada its that perfect blend of Brittish cuisine, French manners and American poppulor culture.

All kiding aside eh?

Many ofmy nicest kindest emails come from Canada. YOU GUYS HAVE A GREAT COUNTRY: PLEASE dont ever break up. Kick Qeubec's ass back in line if you have to but please dont split. As granfather says: IF QUOBEC LEAVES THEN THE REST OF EM WILL JOIN THE USA AN WE DONT NEED 20 MILION NEW POUTINE-EATERS ON OUR WELFAIRE ROLLS DAMMIT.

Thankyou All

I say this to allthe poeple who read Walter Millers hompage. SINCERLY THANKS I dont know all your names but evrey hit i get (NOT from granfather hittin ME) is a boost to my poor selfesteem. Every little numericol tick on that crappy Prodigy page countor means SOMEONE CARES. Or perhaps someons LOST or somhow someone thinks they coud find porno pitcures off my site. Well they CANT cause there arent any.

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