Walter Miller Homepage -- SPECIAL POLITICOL UPDATE
Part I

As promised and due to reader demand, welcome to our very first

Special Politicol Update

Whicich will come to you in 2 parts:

Hes not just an animal-hes a politicol animal

and also

Part II:
Grampas brushes with fame

Yes the old coot personally knows lumminaries over the years like Ross Perrot and Lindon Johnson and has also had run-ins with other famuous people most notably Cheif Executives. Part II recounts some of these eppisodes--THERE TRUE, BELIEVE IT OR NOT. (Of course most readers may choose NOT)

First for Part One: A Political Animal

Mean old Gramps watched both politicol conventions on TV nonstop 24 hours a day flipping channels back an forth between network an cable. I tell you my brain is fried from bein in the same room with him from all his rambling on and on, plus spittin tobacco juice at the TV screen anytime he saw Clintin which was ALOT. Meanwhile as I said granfather is planning to vote for Clintin, and actually LIKES Clintom but no matter.

Many people have wrote to say to me

How can your granfather be a democrat?

On the one hand this is sort of insoulting to Republocans, as if they have some sort of claim on the old monster. But on the other, in the words of granfather THEM DEMMYCRATS GOT A BIGGER TENT THEN THEY BARGIANED FOR WITH ME AROUND.

Disecting the politicol animal

One day granfather will be disected for real. But until that happey day comes we can examine his polliticol veiws.

YES, granfathers a Democrat but a self-hatting conservative democrat. Here in texas they have a thing called a yellow dog Democrat. There are roural parts of the state that are 90% democrat and theyll vote for anyone whose a democrat running even if its a yellow dog. However these Democrats in our part of the state bare no resemblance to the democrats in big cities and in Washington. On a national level the old leech usualy votes rebuplican.

Other than vottin for Clintin in 92, he voted against every democrat in national electoins since he was old enough in the 50s. Except in 1964 he votted (fraudullently I might add) for BOTH Goldwatter and LBJ and did so oddley enuogh because he liked both of them.

Voting for Clinton was an annomolly. He likes the way Clinton wheadles out of bein repeadetly accused of womanizing and being a cheat and a crook whenther clinton did these things or not. YOU GOTTA RESPECT THE MAN he says.

I guess granfather is politicolly conservative enough to turn back the clock in America and also votes Demoucrat to keep the checks rolling in so he coud stay on his lazy butt as hes been on some sort of welfare since he was a kid in the 1930s.

I cant figure him out

Politics must be the most disgustin profession of all because while granfather gripes about them all he also deep down loves all polliticians. For example he railes against Bob Dole that all he is is a spoiled rich boy from the Dole pineappele fortune. I tell him NO granfather hes not relleted to the fruit people and he says SHUT UP BOY. He says Dole an his pals want to outlaw the dirtey magazines he likes so much. Yet when Dole is givin a speech on TV granfather says I LIKE HIM HE HAS A MEAN STREAK LIKE ME AND PLUS IS A WAR HERO. Also granfather is excited about a 15% tax cut. JUST THINK THATS 15% MORE MONEY FOR MORE COLECTIBLES BOY. IM VOTIN FOR DOLE, DAMMIT. Then the next day he says hes votin for Clinton again.

How ill vote

Personaly-I dont know how ill vote. No one i know my age is registered or even votes. I cant make up my mind. I might vote for Dole because when they raised the miminum wage that Clintin kept pushin for i got cut back from 40 hours a week to 30 becuase the company now has to pay there people more. Mabye thats an excuse cause the raise didnt happen yet.

But on the other hand i may vote for clinton only because hes probly more for freedom of the press. Also, if you put Dole and Clintin both in a room an showed them my web site, both woud say they didnt understand it or didnt like it--But at least in private while Dole STILL woudnt get it, Clinton woud probly secretly admit he DOES get it and he thinks its funny as hell.

Random Thuoghts from the Chairman: Granfathers other random views on varrouis politicians, based on the tourtourous weeks endured watching the conventions with the old beast