Walter Miller Homepage

Where men are men and flies come to comitt siucide


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My whole world is falling apart and I dont KNOW WHAT IM GOING TO DO. Im also dealing with severe emotoinal problems. We had one hell of a 4th of July weekend and now granfather is on the loose and i dont know what to do. Ive alerted the authorties. They said theres nothin realy anyone can do because he has a right to travel freeley. Theres no law for keepin someone suppervised in public becuase they hapen to be disgusting. YES HES OUT THERE ALONE IN PUBLIC! ILL GET TO THE DETAILES LATER IN THIS UPDATE.

Part of my world falling apart is my own fualt-I cant stop my afections for a women who wont love me. Its my former counselor i want to marry. Its tearin me up. Sometines Im angrey but mostly Im depresed and cry. I promised not to call her anymore. Also I wrote her 2 leters but she didn wrote back. I have to break the bonds an get on with my miseorable life -I KNOW!!

My new counselor says i have problems seeking aprouval of others too. Also Im told I exagerate.

Im a compoulsive self-seeker

Yes I have compulsive needs to make people pay atention to me and pity too. Also a poor selfimage and low-esteam plus an inabilty to concontrate on tasks. All of this may be the key to these 2 facts: WHY I have a web page and WHY its so crappy. They may have to put me on Ridalin.

But the more imediate concerns--an escaped monstor!

Heres all the ugley facts-a timetable of events leadin up to granfathers disaperance:

As you know weve been fighting. The fights had got worse. I layed down the law that granfather must behave more like a human an LESS blike a animol. Read the July update for details if you havent. YES theres a difforence between kitchen and bathroom habits. TRY TELLIN HIM. Im thinking of startin a Brown Ribbon campaihgn to free the world and his fammily from my disgousting grandfather. I dont think any poppular cause these days is usin a brown ribbon.

It all began when granfather demanded-not asked but COMMANDED me to take him to a antieque Auto flea market a few hours drive away he read about in a newsleter. As you know he colects hubcaps, spartplugs, oil cans an lisence tags. He wanted to go Sunday. I said ONLY if he behaves himself.

He behaved good Monday Teusday and Wedsnday. Your aware of the problems with the nuts. Well now he improved and only cracks open nuts against his forehead. Yes his forehead. But when Thursday July 4 came aroun it brought back alot of bad childhood memories for me.

"Dance! I said DANCE you little varmints!"

The bad July memories of my granfather are of him lightin firecrackers with a cigarete an throwin them at me an my brother. We had to spend summers with him as kids. Wed try to hide but woud run around the yard scraeming and crying while granfather threw them at us lauged hystericolly and said DANCE! DANCE!

We never got any toes blowned off but got burnt a few times and once I fell on a rake runnin away. Saddistic basterd. He threw firecrackors also at the dogs, chickons and barn cats even if they hid under the porch. (The chickens were too stupid to hide under the porch.)

These wasnt small fire crackors-they were big ones like cherrey bombs and M-80s. He also he used to lite bottle rockets an put them in his teeth and then look at you and grin like satan. You knew the bottel rocket was comin. It was a miracle we never got hit.

Well hes older and wiser now and he still does it but uses the regular firecrackors that are just one inch in size. They come in a brick. He mostly he throws them around the yard in the dirt. Ocasionaly hell throw one at me or one of the poor dogs. Useually one brick for each day of the weekend-one firecracker at a time will satisfy the evil in his heart. Until the inevitoble hapenned...