Walter Miller Homepage

May 1996 Update

Page 3 of 4


A most dangerous hobbey

Another time, granfather was unconscuios from getting stung so many times. Before the parramedics arrived I picked as many dead bees an stingers off as I coud with tweazers, but he always survived. The other wierd thing: even bees that are not suposed to die after stingin someone do indeed die after contact with the old monster. Maybe hes natourally toxic. Maybe its his repoulsive stink. Who the hell knows. The fact is that he contuneully endangers his life becaus he can't stay the hell out of the danm barns to look at, and inventorrey, and guard his friggin' colectibles. Whos goingto steal 500 pound machine parts, trash can lids, rusty old license tags, toilet fixtures and crusty car parts? So far, stuff's fell on him and almost killed him and hes been attacked by bees, scorpions and rattelsnakes that live in all the nooks and cranneys. Hes just an obsessive colector...But I digress. Back to the trailor, and what I saw when I found the stuppid old basterd....

Betwean a rock and a hardplace

The wheelchair was in the corner, an there was granfather laying on his stomach with his head wegded between two pipes under the sink. These 2 pipes are so close together you never thought someone could get his head stuck there. His moulth was wide open an a thick pipe laid right across it. His teeth were dug into the pipe an he was chewin his way out. There was metal shavings on his teeth an lips. The guys a friggin animal. Also, sone sort of glue that was under the sink (it wasnt Crazey Glue) was spilled and the side of his body was stuck to the plywood on the bottom of the sink vanity.

I tryed to move him an he scremed some more, shakkin violently. There was a few bees on him but not alot of them. In the past, Ive seen him walk around with 7 or 8 bees on him and not even notice. Once even, he had a dead bee stuck on his eyelid for about 3 days

Now THATS gotta hurt

After a few minuets I was able to figure out what happened: He was in the machinery shed an had got stung by a scorpion. It was still in his pants. He came back inside the trailor, pitched himself forward out of the wheelchair, (which he often does), an then crawled on his elbows to get under the sink to get oven cleaner to sprey it. (My Grandfather uses ovon cleaner right on his bare skin--it doesnt harm him). He screamed at me to take his pants off and I did. The scorpoin got him right on the scrottum and was hangin on with one of his pinchers. It wasn't pinching on the ball part but on the skin part and it must of hurt like hell. An intresting sidenote which may or may not be discussed in my Feb 96 update, was the odd fact that granfather had pollygonadysis--he was born with three testocles. However, as a young man, he lost a testocle and is now down to two. He said it was a war wound, but my uncle (Granfather's brother) told me it was as a result of a freak accodint involving a electric belt sander. Within, perhaps, as some have suggested, (but that I dont want to even think about), a dark and dramattic auto-aurotic episode during his twisted, manaiaical youth.

"You already know the way"...

...that's what I told the amboulance dispatcher. Granfather warned me, through his scraems, that if I ever left to go back to California he would tell the authorities that I was the one who put him under the sink and put oven cleaner and glue on his skin an a scorpion in his pants. In his own pevverse way he NEEDS me there so he can abuse me.

He told me that hed make sure that I would go to Texas State prison where I would be a "maytag" for someone. A maytag is a bigger inmate and you have to wash his underwear, go downstairs and get him a can of pop or cigaretes if he wants it, and also DO OTHER THINGS WITH HIM.

Granfather's Revvisionist Family History